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 Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment

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shades

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PostSubject: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeSat Dec 10, 2016 9:52 am

and it did not apply towards a girl but towards his friends who had started dating girls. Dylan didn't seem to like it very much when people closest to him begin ties with other people.

At first it was as we know of was when Zack started dating Devon:
"My best friend ever: the friend who shared, experimented, laughed, took chances with, & appreciated me more than any friend ever did has been has been ordained.... "passed on".... in my book. Ever since [edited] (who I wouldnt mind killing) has loved him... thats the only place hes been: with her... If anyone had any idea how sad I am... I mean we were the TEAM. When him & I first were friends, hell I finally found someone who was like me: who appreciated me & showed very common interests. Ever since 7th grade ive felt lonely... when [edited] came around, I finally felt hapiness (sometimes)... we did cigars, drinking, sabotage to houses, EVERYTHING for the first time together. & now that he's"moved on" I feel so lonely, w/o a friend."


and when Eric was seeing Sasha:
"Eric will be getting farther away soon... I'll have less than nothing... how normal. I wanted to love... i wanted to be happy and ambitious and free & nice & good & ignorant.... everyone abandoned me."

What does this say about Dylan? It says alot where he's always had this perspective within him.
So adding his depression and meeting Eric to the mix, It's no surprise he yes-ended his buddy to causing the massacre.

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thedude11




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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeSun Dec 11, 2016 1:47 am

Honestly, Dylan's still such a mystery to me. Like, his brain is wired differently... We can never know what was his family really like, nor those childhood years despite what Sue says, it's understandable, it's her child, those new photos she shared paint a picture of a good childhood too, it could've been great or it could've been not so good, we'll never actually know if something happened that caused Dylan to be that detached and feel like he'll be abandoned by people.

It's such a strong inability with both of the boys to grasp a bigger picture and to actually look into the future. Yes Dylan, it's high school, fickle minds, insecurity, problems that only seem huge to kids his age, it's supposed to be like that! You're not supposed to form some ultra strong bonding with someone in high school, it happens but most of the times it doesn't last for life, they claimed they were Gods and were so smart, but why couldn't they see this? 'Analyse' high school kids their age and actually understand that, that's how it supposed to be, if they were so smart and mature they should've understood this, move on and show them they could be successful at their own game! Own game, meaning, this Earth, this society...

But no, Dylan has this, inner void, some sort of demon that bothers him all the time. Feeling he'll be abandoned, feeling he's made fun of all the time, feeling unworthy of girls he likes... It's just all so strange, even though they had all these hobbies, DOOM, music, home videos, computers, it's just surprising he yes-ended Eric into this like you said. Also the weirdest thing is, how could he look at his home, friends, parents in that last week of his life, knowing he'll die and not give a damn... Could you possibly imagine him looking at Sue on April the 19th, knowing he won't be there in that very house the next day? He was seriously mentally off.
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Kiwik

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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeSun Dec 11, 2016 12:29 pm

thedude11 wrote:
Honestly, Dylan's still such a mystery to me. Like, his brain is wired differently... We can never know what was his family really like, nor those childhood years despite what Sue says, it's understandable, it's her child, those new photos she shared paint a picture of a good childhood too, it could've been great or it could've been not so good, we'll never actually know if something happened that caused Dylan to be that detached and feel like he'll be abandoned by people.

Deep down I feel like there was definitely some dysfunction going on in their family. Sue admitted to having her own insecurities and a lot of times that can rub off on your kids. Dylan and Byron didn't get along and Byron was kicked out of the house. You never really know what goes on behind closed doors, and it's possible that Dylan's relationship with his family is what contributed to his mental state.

I had a similar mentality to Dylan's when I was around his age. Whenever my friends coupled off I resented their significant other's. I only dated a few people in high school and all those relationships were short lived, so my friendships were very important to me. At home my family was very dysfunctional during those years; my older sister didn't get along with me or my mom, and my mom and I were both artists and had the stereotypical moodiness and instability that often gets associated with artists, and knowing Sue was an artist as well I wonder if Dylan's home life was similar to mine behind closed doors.
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Kiwik

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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeSun Dec 11, 2016 1:10 pm

thedude11 wrote:
It's such a strong inability with both of the boys to grasp a bigger picture and to actually look into the future. Yes Dylan, it's high school, fickle minds, insecurity, problems that only seem huge to kids his age, it's supposed to be like that! You're not supposed to form some ultra strong bonding with someone in high school, it happens but most of the times it doesn't last for life, they claimed they were Gods and were so smart, but why couldn't they see this? 'Analyse' high school kids their age and actually understand that, that's how it supposed to be, if they were so smart and mature they should've understood this, move on and show them they could be successful at their own game!

Another thing I know I forget at times when reading about e&d's mentality is how easy it is to look back as an adult and think "why do you care so much? High school is temporary, and when it's over you can do whatever you want with your life and you never have to see any of those assholes ever again if you don't want to." But I think expectations/pressures of society had a lot to do with them expecting to, for example, lose their virginity or at least experience having a serious relationship by a certain age. Then as they see everyone around them coupling off and they can't even find a date, it probably makes them feel like failures which I'm sure contributed to Dylan's depression. Both boys seemed to be very sensitive deep down, and it would be hard for a sensitive person to see the bigger picture when they're having such a bad (in their opinion) experience.
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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeMon Dec 12, 2016 10:43 am

Dylan def did take things as slights or personal when they were not meant to be. Zach finding a girlfriend was obv not something against Dylan but he took it that way. If he took everything in his life that way I can see why it was so hard for him

Things that others might see as tiny and insignificant could have been things that Dylan remembered for years. His life moving to middle school was tough. This is something that happens to everyone-a normal transition of life. It was especially tough for him.

Reminds me of Jefferey Dahmer in way. Just in the sense that Dylan would attach himself to someone and then not want that someone to ever leave him or "betray' him.

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shades

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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeMon Dec 12, 2016 11:15 am

But is this dependent-abandonment issue the same as others who go through the same or is this something that goes way back as you guys said with Dylan meaning the way he was brought up or passed down from a family member?
If anything, Eric should have this complex, considering how he was moved around and was losing friends. Or maybe he feels the same exact way but he portrays it through all the hard anger and rage rants, while Dylan was a little more sentimental with it.

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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeMon Dec 12, 2016 11:16 am

You guys are right, It's like he needs to be shaken a little and be told dude! this isn't going to last, it is okay, they're your friends, you gotta be happy for them and let them be.

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shades

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PostSubject: Re: Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment   Dylan's Early Signs of Detachment and Abandonment Icon_minitimeMon Dec 12, 2016 11:57 am

I feel like sometimes it's obligatory to snap out of things and move on strong, but the way you feel means alot more especially when you're hurt. In hindsight we wonder why Dylan was gloomy too much but in all honesty I totally get how he saw things. He was yearning for happiness, so do some of us.

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