Twenty years of Columbine

20 years ago this morning Dylan writes his entry in calculus.



1 One day. one is the beginning? the end. hahaha. reversed, yet true. About 26.5 hours from now the judgement will begin. Difficult, but not impossible, necessary, nervewracking & fun.

What fun is life without
a little death?

Its interesting, when im in my human form, knowing im going to die. Everything has a touch of triviality to it. like how none of this calculus shit matters. the way it shuldn't. the truth. In 26.4 hours ill be dead, & in happiness. The little zombie human fags will know their errors, & be forever suffering & mournful, HAHAHA, of course i will miss things. not really.


24 hours from now he’d get his wish.

Anyone else going to do anything for the anniversary?
I'm going to sit at home rewatch the Zero Hour documentary and then watch Bowling for Columbine and We Are Columbine.

Going to the memorial

Screamingophelia wrote:

20 years ago this morning Dylan writes his entry in calculus.



1      One day. one is the beginning? the end. hahaha. reversed, yet true. About 26.5 hours from now the judgement will begin. Difficult, but not impossible, necessary, nervewracking & fun.

What fun is life without
a little death?

Its interesting, when im in my human form, knowing im going to die. Everything has a touch of triviality to it. like how none of this calculus shit matters. the way it shuldn't. the truth. In 26.4 hours ill be dead, & in happiness. The little zombie human fags will know their errors, & be forever suffering & mournful, HAHAHA, of course i will miss things. not really.


24 hours from now he’d get his wish.

This is so weird to re-read that right now, we know what was to happen but we cannot do anything anymore because it happened, as a kind of future that we are aware of but cannot do anything to alter it, this is heartbreaking.

Clogerhead wrote:

Anyone else going to do anything for the anniversary?
I'm going to sit at home rewatch the Zero Hour documentary and then watch Bowling for Columbine and We Are Columbine.

Im doing the same thing

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Right now, it is about twenty minutes after three in the afternoon in Colorado. At this moment twenty years ago, fifteen people had just finished their last full day of school. But only two of them knew it.

It's April 20th in my country now.

As you go through the motions of daily living, you do so many little things that you don't even think about.

Right now, I'm eating a cup of yogurt and drinking a bottle of water. But what if that cup of yogurt ended up being the last thing I ever ate, and what if that bottle of water ended up being the last thing I ever drank?

When I took a shower this morning, did I consider the possibility that I might have been taking my last? When I brushed my teeth? When I took the garbage out? When I put the laundry in the dryer? All of these are things I do all the time; would they have any more meaning if I knew that I would never get the chance to do any of them again?

In their final hours, did Eric and Dylan think, "This is the last time I will do this. This is the last time I will see this. This is the last time I will hear this, touch this, taste this, smell this, feel this"?

I just wish they could've been helped. Their hearts were eaten by hatred and anger.

I don't have anything of interest to add, I've just got a really heavy heart this week and glad that there are other people who are thinking of them, too.

Eric and Dylan were at dinner now

Lauren was do h at a game

I don’t remember where I was the night before but I remember the day after

My heart is heavy

Right now, it is about ten minutes before eight.

Screamingophelia wrote:

Eric and Dylan were at dinner now

At Outback Steakhouse.

Dylan ate potato skins. After he died, the coroner found them in his stomach.

From Susan Klebold's book:

April 19 was a Monday, and Dylan let me know he wouldn’t be home for dinner. He'd made plans to go to a steakhouse with Eric, the same restaurant where we had eaten with Eric's family two months earlier.

"What’s the occasion?" I asked. (When Dylan ate with friends, they usually went for fast food.) He told me Eric had a couple of coupons. They didn't need a reason, as far as I was concerned. Three weeks from graduation, they were about to move on to the next phase of their lives and I applauded their impulse to celebrate. I told Dylan to have a good time.

He got home about 8:30, and I greeted him at the door. "How was it?" "Good," he said, as he removed his muddy shoes. Always trying to pull a little more information, I asked, "What did you have for dinner?" He looked up from his shoes, tilting his head to one side so he could give me a "Come on, Mom" look; they'd gone to a steakhouse. "Uh, steak?" he said. We both laughed.

Tom was reading in the living room, and I asked Dylan if he had time to sit down with us for a minute, but he said he had a lot of work to do, adding he'd probably have to be in his room all evening to get everything done. He seemed particularly evasive and eager to get upstairs; I assumed he had some last-minute, end-of-year homework to finish up. The phone rang a few times; I let Dylan get it. I do not remember kissing him, or going to his room to say good night. I am still trying to forgive myself for not remembering if I did or not.

Its really been 20 years...wow...

it is officially THE 20TH ANIVERSITY. OH MY GOD!!!!

It's almost midnight here. It's almost 20 years after Columbine, and the effects of the shooting are still being felt today. I wonder how peacefully Eric and Dylan slept? I wonder how many parents wish they could go back and kiss their kids goodbye in the morning one last time?

I don’t imagine either slept welll

Screamingophelia wrote:

I don’t imagine either slept welll

I don't either. I think they both would have been so anxious knowing what was to come. I wonder what they thought about on what would be their last night on Earth? They knew what was to come, but no one else did. All their other victims expected just another day at school.

hvernon wrote:

Screamingophelia wrote:

I don’t imagine either slept welll

I don't either. I think they both would have been so anxious knowing what was to come. I wonder what they thought about on what would be their last night on Earth? They knew what was to come, but no one else did. All their other victims expected just another day at school.

I think Dylan got calls into the evening and I sometimes imagine Eric preparing but also having sparky by his feet.

We know he was up late because he mentions the time I think on the Nixon take

Screamingophelia wrote:

hvernon wrote:

Screamingophelia wrote:

I don’t imagine either slept welll

I don't either. I think they both would have been so anxious knowing what was to come. I wonder what they thought about on what would be their last night on Earth? They knew what was to come, but no one else did. All their other victims expected just another day at school.

I think Dylan got calls into the evening and I sometimes imagine Eric preparing but also having sparky by his feet.

We know he was up late because he mentions the time I think on the Nixon take

Yeah if he (or Jeffco) wasn't lying or mistaken or whatever, it's around 2:30 a. m. on the Nixon tape, "less than 9 hours now", presumably less than 9 hours until 11:17 or 11:20.

qq for sparky

It is now 12AM in Colorado. In 11 hours today in 1999, history will be changed, 13 lives will be lost, and the issue of Gun Violence is put on the spotlight. Many shootings will be inspired by the one that took place 11 hours from now, on this day, in 1999

LPorter101 wrote:

As you go through the motions of daily living, you do so many little things that you don't even think about.

Right now, I'm eating a cup of yogurt and drinking a bottle of water. But what if that cup of yogurt ended up being the last thing I ever ate, and what if that bottle of water ended up being the last thing I ever drank?

When I took a shower this morning, did I consider the possibility that I might have been taking my last? When I brushed my teeth? When I took the garbage out? When I put the laundry in the dryer? All of these are things I do all the time; would they have any more meaning if I knew that I would never get the chance to do any of them again?

In their final hours, did Eric and Dylan think, "This is the last time I will do this. This is the last time I will see this. This is the last time I will hear this, touch this, taste this, smell this, feel this"?

This was the last message I read yesterday night right before going to sleep and I can tell you that it really got me down and I didn't sleep well.

  

The 20th anniversary is mentioned in Australian media as apparently police arrested two South Australian students plotting their own shooting, inspired by Columbine.

Eric has written that he wanted the attack to cause "a chain reaction of hate" and he wanted others to do the same as when he and Dylan were planning. Safe to say Columbine has inspired hundreds of copycat attacks.

We need someone new to do an AMA. I wish Zach Hekler or Nate Dykman did one.

It's almost 6 a.m., the time they had planned to meet up in the morning, exactly 20 years ago. 20 years...

Right now it is about five minutes to six in Denver. Sunrise is at 6:15. At this moment twenty years ago, fifteen people were about to see the last new dawn of their lives.

Tuesday, April 20, 1999 - 6 a.m. (all times Mountain)

From A Columbine Site:

Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold skipped their first class of the day: bowling, which usually ran from 6 AM to 7:15 AM. Their teacher, Kristine Macauley said that Klebold and Harris were on a team with Chris Morris and and Nate Dykeman and also noted later in FBI document 174A-DN-57419 that despite "always" being in bowling class, Harris, Klebold, and Morris were all missing that morning. She said that Morris "rarely" missed the class but had been missing it more and more frequently in the weeks before the shootings. Student Jen Laplante told teacher Macauley that she had seen Klebold and Harris in the parking lot of the AMF Belleview Bowling Lanes the day of the shooting and had even said hi to them. However, they never made it into class.

Here is a summation of their activities (not written by me) on the morning of 4/20:

There’s no definitive timeline for Eric and Dylan’s movements on the morning of 4/20 because of many conflicting sightings. We do have the various timelines from their journals, but a lot of what they did that morning is up to speculation. It’s generally agreed that Eric and Dylan were running behind their pre-planned schedules that day. Here’s the best estimation I have of what happened that morning:

At around 5am, Dylan left his house. In Eric’s school day planner, Dylan writes that he will “get up” at 5am and that he and Eric will “meet at KS” at 6am. Considering this, we could assume that Eric also left his house early, after leaving a micro cassette tape (referred to as the ‘Nixon Tape’) on the kitchen counter. On the tape, Eric explains the events that will happen and says that they will happen in “less than nine hours now”, placing the recording of the tape at around 2am.

The timeline in Eric’s day planner then says that they will go to Eric’s house at 7am. Then, at 7:15am, Eric will leave “to fill propane” and Dylan will “leave to fill gas”. The security tape from a Texaco gas station shows Eric buying propane. The timestamp on this tape reads 7:56-57am, but his receipt says that the propane was paid for at 9:12am. In her statement to the police, the cashier at Texaco (Tammy McGinnis) stated that the timing on the tape recording mechanism was off by about an hour and twenty minutes, because she did not know how to change it. Along with the receipt from Texaco, a receipt from Conoco was found at Eric’s house which stated that he bought 2 propane tanks at 8:36am. It is unknown exactly what Dylan was doing during this time, but the timeline in Eric’s planner does say that they would meet back at Eric’s house at 8:30am, so I’m assuming that Dylan would have been there. Dylan wrote that they would put everything in their duffel bags and set up their cars at 9am, and “practice gearups” at 9:30am. Dylan also writes in some time to “chill...” after this, yet as we assume they were running late, I doubt they actually had any time to sit around. They were both at Eric’s house during the filming of the last basement tape (around 30 minutes before the shooting), and it’s worth noting that Dylan was rushing Eric to finish talking so they could go to the school.

At some point in the morning, Eric and Dylan would have finalized all their preparations, including assembling the bombs which they made with the new propane tanks. Eric and Dylan also planted two backpacks filled with pipe bombs, aerosol canisters, and small propane bombs in a field 3 miles south of Columbine High School at some point in the morning. The field was 2 miles south of the fire station, with the diversion bombs set to detonate at 11:14am.

Eric and Dylan are visible on the cafeteria security cameras at 10:58 and 10:59am, separately placing duffel bags in the cafeteria. According to the plan that Dylan wrote in his own day planner, they would go to school and set up the bombs, then go to Clement Park and gear up. It’s worth mentioning that, on the cafeteria security tapes, Eric and Dylan appear in different clothes to what they wore during the massacre (perhaps to appear more inconspicuous). In his own day planner, Dylan wrote that they would aim to be back at school at 11:15am. Chad Laughlin stated that Dylan almost collided with him in the school parking lot at around this time as he was rushing to get back to the school. Kristi Epling stated that she saw Eric pull into the parking lot at around the same time. With the bombs set to detonate at 11:17am, this means that Eric and Dylan arrived with almost no time to spare before the attack was planned to start.

Eric at the gas station. Keep in mind that the timestamp is off by over an hour:

Neah wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

As you go through the motions of daily living, you do so many little things that you don't even think about.

Right now, I'm eating a cup of yogurt and drinking a bottle of water. But what if that cup of yogurt ended up being the last thing I ever ate, and what if that bottle of water ended up being the last thing I ever drank?

When I took a shower this morning, did I consider the possibility that I might have been taking my last? When I brushed my teeth? When I took the garbage out? When I put the laundry in the dryer? All of these are things I do all the time; would they have any more meaning if I knew that I would never get the chance to do any of them again?

In their final hours, did Eric and Dylan think, "This is the last time I will do this. This is the last time I will see this. This is the last time I will hear this, touch this, taste this, smell this, feel this"?

This was the last message I read yesterday night right before going to sleep and I can tell you that it really got me down and I didn't sleep well.

Sorry about that. If it's any consolation, I didn't sleep a wink, either.

Eric and Dylan planting the bombs in the cafeteria:

LPorter101 wrote:

Eric and Dylan planting the bombs in the cafeteria:

That is so Dylan, the way he walks. Its the way he walks...

So, today is the 20th anniversary. When the shooting happened, I was far, far away. And still am: In Germany. And I was basically too young to understand what was happening as I was only 8 and a half years. But the world started to make sense to me. Reading fluently and writing quickly was a thing as being a 3rd grade elementary school student, and life seemed to peaceful. I would play Worms and Tomb Raider with my friends, would go their home. Our entire suburb's kids was a group, a bunch. World was really a never-ending holiday for some reason. Summer and winter - it was great. And only left as memories. Like a sealed can of happy memories of an average, German boy.

But for some reason, Columbine is a big part of it. When I see watch the footage, when I see the CRT, when I see the building layout of CHS (we started to get a similar achitecture for our local university here, except for a parking lot, there is a pond in front of the cafeteria (mensa) and library. Yes, they did the exact same thing), the flickering CRT monitors, the shaky VHS footage of some nice day at the shooting range (read as: Nice weather and I can smell the pinecones by just looking at it!), the clothes of the people (light shirts). I hear Britney Spears in my head as her most-known album was released on exact 4/20/99. The cars.  and think about "Malcolm In The Middle", or "Malcolm Mittendrin" as it is called here being on TV.

Despite being basically disconnected "Over here", thinking about Columbine makes me un-seal my happy memory childhood can and it comes back so much. In 2009 or 2010 or something, I read about it the first time and was absolutely overwhelmed. The Wikipedia entry was unexpectedly shocking to me, and it is so strangely close for some reason. I really don't know where this comes from, but this school shooting has hit me hard, and I can't get over it. Today I thought about it at work - absolutely random while waiting for the good's lift. Thinking about the students who died would be in their like 40s now? Gives me the shivers.

So, I am sitting here and felt the urge to log in, type this off of my soul and go back to lurk-mode. Out of all the random people, I am probably one that can give sincere condolences as my heart is broken for all involved - including the Harrisses and Klebolds.

I am sitting in my home in Littleton Colorado now.

I am heavily debating going to the special event because they were unclear if it's only for the people of Columbine or everyone. The guy on the news made it very clear they didn't want to be a tourist attraction, and even being native I wanna respect that. I'm guessing the latter, but with everything that's happened this week I don't want to intrude, or for people to be hostile. Everyone's super on edge, there's still cop cars everywhere.

Just thinking, that I drive by all these place they were 20 years ago, when I was a baby. That I was alive in the same city as all this, it gives me a very weird feeling. I may try to drive around at the least to get some video but I'm still unsure. This is all such a weird feeling. That Brooks Brown, Sue Klebold, maybe, just maybe even the Harris' may be in town today. I'm sitting here, in the same town, as one of the most infamous events in history.

It sounds like there are some private events for alumni and families but there’s a main one of the community this afternoon.

It was probably around this time 20 years ago that Rachel and Craig Scott were pulling into school. Running late because Craig took too long to get ready. They argued about it on the drive. When they arrived Craig slammed the door in her face while she was trying to talk to him. Little did he know that would be the last moment he would see his big sister alive...

it is such a brother and sister argument too and you don't think about things like that. You figure "oh it'll be fine later"


I think Rachel had an audition for the RNN station that morning?

With all the community gatherings going on I cannot help but think of the Klebold and Harris families. I don't know if they would feel welcome. Even with all the talk of forgiveness and healing.

For what it is worth Dylan and Eric's families are in my heart too. Also any of their friends who feel like they wouldn't be welcomed by the community even now. My heart is with you.

I've seen photos of Sue at the memorial before but I'm not sure she would be at the main event.

I drove by this morning and got a quick video, I can't find the USB for my camera so I'll have to wait to upload.

The suns beautiful in Littleton today
The day is beautiful
Much like it probably was that day.
It's the perfect temperature, perfect amount of blue sky and clouds
Maybe to them, it was the perfect day for something like this to happen

I’m going to try to go to the memorial earlier to leave flowers. Just so I don’t disrupt any family or friends that might be coming later. Then I’m going to go to the community event this afternoon.

I imagine it’s going to bring lot back seeing media and police presence around the school

It'd be interesting to meet you hah, but I'm way too shy. I may head there soon.

I went by the school and there's cops planted in the parking lot and around the park. They were also scattered around Bowles and the jeffco area during the Sol Pais scare. So far I haven't seem much media, but they always seem to arrive and remain inconspicuous right under my nose when this stuff happens. I was actually kind of surprised how little people were in the park so far

Westygalery wrote:

It'd be interesting to meet you hah, but I'm way too shy. I may head there soon.

Lol

Who knows maybe we will run into each other and will be like were you the person in the blue shirt.

I’m gonna walk over, and I’m not bringing any kind of purse or anything like that just some tissue and the flowers.

haha we'll see.

It's about 10:00 in Colorado, where I am it's noon. I really wonder what their last hour must've felt like. The last hour! It's almost impossible to think about. I can hardly imagine how jittery they must've felt.