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 "I hate being home"

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Engel
QuestionMark
Kinkeloukaitis
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PostSubject: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeFri May 13, 2022 1:19 am

CulturalPhilistine makes a joke:
"I'll go to the highest rated quizzes. Who is my perfect girl? Guys only."

"This is kind of a strange quiz, I'm not sure what it's talking about. Who does it mean by you? And does this...I mean, who's my perf-whatever, I'll go to home. I hate being home, I'll go there anyway.

And we know that there was an incident at the movie theater where he expressed a similar sentiment:
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Why did Adam not like being at home?

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Kinkeloukaitis

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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeSat May 14, 2022 2:31 pm

Maybe he felt isolated and alone at home, and being outside was like a connection to the world? Idk.
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QuestionMark
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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeSat May 14, 2022 9:26 pm

Kinkeloukaitis wrote:
Maybe he felt isolated and alone at home, and being outside was like a connection to the world? Idk.

I think while that's certainly a factor I also think maybe whatever hatred he felt towards Nancy (and I am inclined to think he hated her) influenced his desire to stay away from home. Being alone with someone you at the very least dislike probably makes the loneliness feel more acute and stifling.

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Engel

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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeTue Jun 07, 2022 1:11 am

Maybe while he did enjoy being isolated, he probably at the same time hated it?

_________________
"I'll never understand humans. The way they live their lives, their feelings, the things they want to do in life, probably has something to do with these
invisible gods they pray to. Meh"
- Kimveer Gill

"Humanity is overrated, isn't it?" - Matti Saari

"Live in virtue, no desire
And in the grave an angel's choir
You look to heaven and wonder why
No one can see them in the sky

Just as the clouds have gone to sleep
Angels can be seen in heaven's keep
Alone in fear, they question why
Goddamn, not an angel when I die
" - Engel, Rammstein (English version)

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James411




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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeFri Jun 10, 2022 6:15 pm

I think maybe he did not like being with Nancy.
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messianic_mania

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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeWed Jan 10, 2024 6:43 pm

QuestionMark wrote:
Kinkeloukaitis wrote:
Maybe he felt isolated and alone at home, and being outside was like a connection to the world? Idk.

I think while that's certainly a factor I also think maybe whatever hatred he felt towards Nancy (and I am inclined to think he hated her) influenced his desire to stay away from home. Being alone with someone you at the very least dislike probably makes the loneliness feel more acute and stifling.

Absolutely. If he was already so isolated in a way that likely felt inescapeable and inevitable, he wouldn't have enjoyed living with the person he believed forced him into existence and further indoctrinated him into culture... Nancy also seems like she had no real clue how to help Adam other than just trying to give him whatever he asked for, [ie. tissues to open doorknobs, whatever food he requested in the notes he'd leave her..] and it would be even more frusterating to live with someone who was constantly wanting to help you but couldn't. Seeing Nancy would only be a reminder of his problems and scorn for everything around him.
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Shouberty

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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeThu Jan 11, 2024 10:39 am

Adam stated that one of the reasons he didn't feel forced into committing suicide was how "comfortable" his life was. Seeing as this comfort would be further enabled by Nancy, it follows that he should resent her and the comfortable life she provides him with. I don't believe Adam harbored disdain towards Nancy for "indoctrinating" him into civilization, seeing as that would have been inevitable regardless of who raised him, as cultural indoctrination is endemic to life itself. Adam didn't want Nancy's help, Adam wanted to die and she prevented him from pursuing that by being an ordinary maternal figure.

Nancy was no more a reminder of Adam's scorn for humanity than just about everything else that constantly surrounded him. If anything, being deprived of the sheltering comfort that his home provided (such as when he was at the AMC theater) would only perpetuate his bleak outlook, hence why he would prefer it to his home.

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Shouberty

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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeThu Jan 11, 2024 10:43 am

As an aside, the "guys only" thing was not a joke, the title of the quiz legitimately says as such: [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

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AlienPenguin

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PostSubject: Re: "I hate being home"   "I hate being home" Icon_minitimeSat Jan 13, 2024 12:24 pm

First thing that comes to my mind is „try to be homeless“ from Adams list of things he wants to do. That also goes into the direction what Shouberty suggested, that Adam thought life was too comfortable to commit suicide.

Second thing is that if you are introverted and have an overprotecting mother, you dont want to spend time with her. You want to be left in peace but she wants to intervene in your life, see how you are, look after you…
And i dont know how many expectations Nancy still had towards Adam at that time. If he was overwhelmed already with everything, every expectation is just more stress. I remember her expectation that he should use the car to go shopping for himself (see Nancys emails to Marvin)

The mentioned bruise is interesting. Price must have thought Adam gets beaten at home. But im quite sure Adam hurt himself. I remember the „Bloody morning“ mail from Nancy to Marvin. It could have been just an accident, but i believe it is more likely that they had an argument the morning Nancy wanted to leave for her second last journey ever. I think that Adam hurt himself because he knew that Nancy then might give in to his will, because she wants to protect him and not hurt him, as an overprotecting mother. Just my thoughts…

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