horrfying thoughts

whats one scary thing thought or something that got you upset from inside sandy hook during the shooting

That Adam Lanza actually had to do such a thing in the first place, people are shocked by what he did, but the world is evil anyway, many more children were killed in the Indonesian tsunami the other week. It is not just people that are evil, but ther general world as well.

That I cannot hate him.

I still see him as a kid and have to imagine that he had troubles or suffered, maybe because I cannot even start to think that someone would do that only because he is evil. So maybe it is rationalizing. The worse is that at first it didn't even make me feel better because I felt guilty (about all shootings).


And a more shared thought I guess, that the poor children's last minutes were such an horrifying and terrible and scary moment, that they were aware of it and that their parents were aware that their children had been aware of what was happening.

I feel sad because Adam Lanza had a miserable life.

I can say I HATE his actions. Yet I do feel for the person he was before he crossed that line. Clearly Lanza was drowning in mental issues.

For me it’s this:
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Just the way he says it And the fact that children were murdered and never saw their parents again

One thing that shook me up was the story about the one child that survived out of whole room. Rather distressing.

Adam Lanza was certainly a sick fuck. I generally dislike shooters that direct their attacks against especially vulnerable people.

TheDragonoid wrote:

The thing that upset me the most is that i wasn't there on the moment of the attack. Just imagine, being killed while in your youth, without even going through any hardships or getting aware enough of how meanigless life relly is? What a dream.

(Sorry if that was too edgy, BTW. I know how horrible his actions were).

Absolutely nothing "edgy" about that statement you summed it up perfectly.

It upsets me how it seems like he tried to conceal his motive as hard as possible just in order to annoy people or force further speculation and media coverage.

The thing that truly shakes me to my core about Sandy Hook is the fact that Adam Lanza was in the online communities dedicated to true crime research. Although it is so highly unlikely, but I always wonder if someone that may be right under our noses will be the next school shooter. Adam seemed so normal (at least for all of us haha!) in his posts for the most parts. He even seems like the type of person I would have struck up a conversation with.

smiggleshamster wrote:

 The thing that truly shakes me to my core about Sandy Hook is the fact that Adam Lanza was in the online communities dedicated to true crime research. Although it is so highly unlikely, but I always wonder if someone that may be right under our noses will be the next school shooter. Adam seemed so normal (at least for all of us haha!) in his posts for the most parts. He even seems like the type of person I would have struck up a conversation with.

I was floored when I found out that he had been a member of the old board. I mean, it really shook me up. Intellectually, I always knew that it was possible that some member of the board might do something. But I was not prepared to learn that someone with whom I had joked around with online went into an elementary school and murdered dozens of six-year-old children. That revelation, more than anything else, is what prompted me to take a hiatus from Columbine research.

I've always had too much "fun" talking about Columbine. I have a weird sense of humor and it's easy for me to make sick jokes. But learning about Smiggles made it all seem deadly real. (That's an awful thing to say, because I never should have taken the subject lightly in the first place. But, for all of my emotional attachment to the saga of Eric and Dylan, I never felt a true personal connection to NBK. I didn't have any contact with anyone who was personally involved. I didn't have any skin in the game, so to speak.)

Keep in mind that I was the moderator of the old board. That title was very misleading, because I didn't have any real authority. The owner was a free-speech absolutist (as am I) and didn't believe in moderation. One time I deleted a few posts by a notorious troll and he sent me a nasty email saying, "Don't do that again." So I really didn't have much to do except answer people's PMs. And I got *lots* of PMs. Sometimes my inbox was so full that messages would get deleted before I had a chance to read them.

Lots of folks opened up to me about their problems. Some of them got extremely personal. A few of them said they were suicidal, and I tried to help them as best I could. Many people just seemed to want to talk about their feelings without being judged. I did the best I could. I have no expertise in the mental-health field, so I can only hope that I said the right things at the right time.

Smiggles never said anything to me (or anyone else, AFAIK) that indicated that he had any suicidal or homicidal ideation. He did come across as a bit of a pedophile, and, honestly, that really creeped me out. I was friendly toward him at the beginning, but after a while I didn't want to have anything to do with him.

Toward the end of his time on the board, a few people told me they were concerned about him, based on various things that he had said. I asked him about it, and he said, essentially, "I'm fine. If these people have anything to say about me, then they can say it to me directly." He quit the board soon thereafter.

Neah wrote:

That I cannot hate him.

I still see him as a kid and have to imagine that he had troubles or suffered, maybe because I cannot even start to think that someone would do that only because he is evil. So maybe it is rationalizing. The worse is that at first it didn't even make me feel better because I felt guilty (about all shootings).


And a more shared thought I guess, that the poor children's last minutes were such an horrifying and terrible and scary moment, that they were aware of it and that their parents were aware that their children had been aware of what was happening.

I too wrestle with feeling some way sorry for the creature
Hard to put it into words but the fact that he went so far to destroy innocence is deeply sad to me

Probably how he showed no remorse through the whole attack.

Quote :

He did come across as a bit of a pedophile, and, honestly, that really creeped me out. I was friendly toward him at the beginning, but after a while I didn't want to have anything to do with him.

What made you think he was pedo-ish? Did many people perceive him that way?