FUNNIEST Columbine stuff/minutiae?

I swear I'm not trolling or trying to mock a tragedy here....but admit it, in all your readings on the subject, you've occasionally found some stuff that's made you laugh a bit.
Here's a short list...

1)Eric Veik going "I don't like it....I really don't! It makes me....mad!......OOOOOOOOOUUUGGGH!" in "Hitmen For Hire"
2)The face of the girl in the lower right with her arms outstretched in the 1999 Columbine class photo
3)Eric Harris in his journal: "You know what I hate?......cuuuuuhhhhhhhnnnnnntttrrrryyyyyy music!"
4)The Onion article: "Columbine students to safely resume bullying"
5)Dylan blowing his lines in "Hitmen For Hire"
6)Jerry Falwell blaming "Satan" for Columbine
7)The SWAT guy popping out of nowhere in the cafeteria footage at like the 3:18:xx mark
8)Dylan bopping around to that Pulp Fiction song in the video with Nate Dykeman

I find all of Viek's lines in Hitmen for hire to be funny, the way he deliveres them is what makes it hilarious.
The Onion article of course.

I always got a kick out of Eric's journal. Its so over the top I imagine someone reading it in a parody movie and having the voice overlap over itself while reading different entries in a dramatic angry tone.

Here are some highlights from Eric's journal:

spelling is stupid unless I say.

Fri fucking day night.

well hey fuckheads

NO, NO, NO GOD FUCKING DAMIT NO!

well shit I'm to tired wright anymor tonight

wooh, different pen. HA!

DIE manmade words

Pity that a lot of the dead will be a waste in someways, like dead hot chicks who were still bitches

there are probably about 100 people max in the school alone who I dont want to die

there are probly around 10 people I wouldnt want to die

Vodka got his vodka

went to safeway got some donouts

when she wore those shorts to work.. instant hard on.

HA! HAHAHA! neener! Booga Booga. heh.

you know whats weird, I dont feel like a punching through a door

Woohoo, I'll never have to take a final again!

WOOHAH

much shit has happened.

Right now I'm trying to get fucked and trying to finish off these time bombs

ohh fucking nooo.

Eric's hate list is very angry but also very funny. I relate to some of the things sometimes. Like the WB slogan song....omg that was annoying.

I think if you could take out Eric's hate and anger he could have been a funny guy. Some of the things he wrote were downright hilarious.

It's funny how Dylan is trying to say his speech on camera three times, and Eric does everything in one take. Dylan looks pretty scary,Eric is rather funny.

Love wrote:

It's funny how Dylan is trying to say his speech on camera three times, and Eric does everything in one take. Dylan looks pretty scary,Eric is rather funny.

And just think, Dylan was probably laughing like a maniac just like that on the 20. That in and of itself is creepy

Lizpuff wrote:

Love wrote:

It's funny how Dylan is trying to say his speech on camera three times, and Eric does everything in one take. Dylan looks pretty scary,Eric is rather funny.

And just think, Dylan was probably laughing like a maniac just like that on the 20.  That in and of itself is creepy

Looking pretty scary  Especially when you know that this time Dylan shoots people.
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Dance little elves.

Love wrote:

Lizpuff wrote:

Love wrote:

It's funny how Dylan is trying to say his speech on camera three times, and Eric does everything in one take. Dylan looks pretty scary,Eric is rather funny.

And just think, Dylan was probably laughing like a maniac just like that on the 20.  That in and of itself is creepy

Looking pretty scary  Especially when you know that this time Dylan shoots people.
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It's funny hearing them censor themselves, like "freaking" instead of the actual f-word. I know it was for a school project and all but it's still pretty amusing

"Fuck off Brooks! I ain't paying for shit!"

Lizpuff wrote:

Eric's hate list is very angry but also very funny.  I relate to some of the things sometimes.  Like the WB slogan song....omg that was annoying.

I think if you could take out Eric's hate and anger he could have been a funny guy.  Some of the things he wrote were downright hilarious.

I feel like if Eric had a different group of friends he would've been a more upbeat, silly guy. I definitely think he had that side to him. Same with Dylan. Its a shame to say that because he and Dylan were so loyal to each other, but it obviously would've been better for them and everyone else if they weren't friends.

Eric's "YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE" quote about meteorologists is hilarious. His anger over people predicting the weather wrong is ridiculously amusing.

I pretty much agree with what the others are saying about Eric. Reading through his rants, his "you know what I hate?", the missions he had with Dylan and Zack, the stuff about Brooks' lies (and lies people tell about money and their belongings in general) I find all of that really funny and amusing. Eric had a very sarcastic sense of humor and I tend to be like that myself so I can relate to that.

The other thing that I found pretty funny was in the video "Radioactive Clothing", when it first starts off they are sitting in the back seat talking back and forth and they keep saying stuff like "Yep", "yea", "yep", "yea" every time they talk and at one point Eric forgets what the one guy's name is supposed to be and he asks him "What the fuck was your name?"

So yea, those are the few things that stick out for me that I remember getting a laugh from.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] I thought about the "yep's" in radioactive clothing too! Someone on instagram made an edit of all the "yep yup yea's" they say in that video. Also the clip from radioactive clothing where Dylan says something about being smart and Eric (seemingly absently) repeats "smaaaarrrrrrt..." is pretty funny. Sometimes I wonder if they forgot they were being filmed in those videos haha

Kiwik wrote:

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] I thought about the "yep's" in radioactive clothing too! Someone on instagram made an edit of all the "yep yup yea's" they say in that video. Also the clip from radioactive clothing where Dylan says something about being smart and Eric (seemingly absently) repeats "smaaaarrrrrrt..." is pretty funny. Sometimes I wonder if they forgot they were being filmed in those videos haha

Haha, you should definitely post that video if you can. "Radioactive Clothing" is actually a pretty funny skit all the way through. If you actually listen to what they're saying and what the skit is supposed to be about - it's funny. When I originally watched it, I had only half paid attention to it, but then I decided to do a written transcript for it. I did written transcripts for all their videos and posted them on the old forum. I was an idiot and didn't save them and then the forum got deleted and now they are gone. After all that time I sat there listening to these videos and typing them out. Oh well.

Anyhow, yea, it's funny. Then there's this part where they are creeping around in someone's basement and all these clothes start jumping on them and they're screaming and shooting them and then another piece of clothing tries to attack Dylan, he screams and throws a dart at it. I could have been sitting there watching a comedy skit. It's just so hard to believe that this was only a few short weeks before the massacre. They both had a really good sense of humor, they were joking around and seemed to be having a really good time and were enjoying making the video. They basically had everyone fooled including their own parents and friends.

Love wrote:

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Dance little elves.

This is an abomination lmao

They're kind of adorable to be honest. I also love when they're trying to film the car wax commercial video. And Dylan's trying to act, and he's so good at it good at yelling, hahah.

Original Radioactive Clothing

Video on the Yeas....

Just out of curiosity, who was the other guy in the video Radioactive Clothing? I thought it was funny that Eric when he smoked the cigarette, he didn't inhale.

spinvault wrote:

Just out of curiosity, who was the other guy in the video Radioactive Clothing? I thought it was funny that Eric when he smoked the cigarette, he didn't inhale.

Mike V in this as well as Erik V

I had never watched radioactive clothing all the way through before, I had only seen stills, clips and edits of it.

Was this the final version they showed to their teacher or was this a raw version before they edited it? The editing is so bad it's hilarious! I cracked up at them screwing up their lines, and at the end of their dialog in the car where the camera lingers on Dylan and he says "that's all" had me loling. Dylan looked like he was trying not to laugh through most of the car sequence which Also cracked me up. Poor Eric reminds me of Dale from King of the Hill in some parts. I can't believe people have used edits from this video to make them look like badasses. They're such goofs - especially Dylan. They seem like just normal, silly teenagers in this, and its kinda sad.
Thanks [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] for suggesting it and [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] for posting it. Watching this made me wish I was a teacher for one of these kinda classes so I could watch silly student videos like this haha

So we're all aware that Dylan's journal is angsty to the point of almost being a parody and isn't as amusingly angry as Eric's, but you can still find a couple gems that come across as amusing depending on how you look at it.

Here are some highlights from Dylan's journal:

I have just lost fucking $45 and before that I lost my zippo & knife

OK enough bitching, well I’m not done yet

Check it, (this isn’t good, but I need to write), so here

I hope she likes Techno

Fuck that → Dylan Klebold

I want drink. NOW

Anyway, here is a poem.
Fuck me die me

This room sucks.

lost in my little insane asylum with the outhouse redneck music playing.

Beeerr

I was delusional and thought she waved at me the last day of school. Oh well.

This shit again.

I’m forever sorry, infinitely, about the pornos.

Like how none of this calculus shit matters

I don't know if it's really funny or just annoying, but the myth of Eric saying he wanted ketchup with the Cini Minis. People STILL attribute that to him.

Tomb wrote:

I don't know if it's really funny or just annoying, but the myth of Eric saying he wanted ketchup with the Cini Minis. People STILL attribute that to him.

That and in the car wax commercial where everyone thinks Eric is the one behind the camera directing everyone when it's actually Erik Veik (sp? I can never remember how to spell the poor guy's name). Girls have commented on the youtube video staying how much they love "Eric's" voice and laugh and it's not even his. Not to mention Erik V has a fairly stereotypical geeky voice and they would probably never compliment anyone they knew in real life who talked like him. Those kinda things always annoyed me haha

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] I know, right? Lol, you know it's funny how much we think alike. You're awesome, by the way

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] aww shucks! I agree that we think alike and I think you're awesome too! I'm also glad that you chose to stick around, I was seriously bummed at the idea of you leaving!

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] thanks for the kind words. I'm glad I'm sticking around, too. I've made some amazing friends here and I genuinely like being here.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] - I've gotten an abuse complaint about a post you made in this thread. Dylan calling this kid a racist name before murdering him is hardly funny. Your post has been deleted. Please keep stuff like that off the board.

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So, I was reading the statement that Tammy Golden (one of the girls that was in the Columbine parking lot with Robyn Anderson inside Robyn's car during the shooting) gave to the police, and it seems like the detective was thinking of someone else instead of Robyn, lol.

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Gonz wrote:

So, I was reading the statement that Tammy Golden (one of the girls that was in the Columbine parking lot with Robyn Anderson inside Robyn's car during the shooting) gave to the police, and it seems like the detective was thinking of someone else instead of Robyn, lol.

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Hahaha I missed that. That is really funny!

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] lol I missed that, but that is both bizarre and hilarious! Lol, good find!

Gonz wrote:

So, I was reading the statement that Tammy Golden (one of the girls that was in the Columbine parking lot with Robyn Anderson inside Robyn's car during the shooting) gave to the police, and it seems like the detective was thinking of someone else instead of Robyn, lol.

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Good find and thanks for the best laugh I've had all day!!!

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] What a bizarre mistake. Surprising that this made it through.

Eric's JO MAMMA! jokes.

Eric Harris wrote:

JO mamma is so well behaved at dinner parties that no one ever has to tell her to behave! JEEEYAAAA!!


Jo mamma has so many bag clips that her neighbors ask to use some ocasionaly! JEEEYAAAA!!!


Jo mamma's health care plan is so great that she can afford to get sick and hurt and stuff! JJJEEEYAAAAA!!!!!


Jo mamma is so good at counting in seconds that she doesnt need a watch to time things! except long things....JJJEEEYAAAA

You can also find a copy of his website/jo mamma jokes here:

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NoMAD wrote:

Jo mamma has so many bag clips that her neighbors ask to use some ocasionaly! JEEEYAAAA!!!

lol I can't.

shades wrote:

NoMAD wrote:

Jo mamma has so many bag clips that her neighbors ask to use some ocasionaly! JEEEYAAAA!!!

lol I can't.

Right? I wish Eric hadn't shot up his school and committed suicide. The shit he wrote is ridiculous and hilarious and I wish there was more of it haha.

and It's so hilarious because it's also not. Like, it's so strangely detailed and direct but ironically works.

I mean "Jo mamma's health care plan is so great that she can afford to get sick and hurt and stuff! JJJEEEYAAAAA!!!!!" like what?????!! haahaha

I think his jo mamma jokes were supposed to mock actual jo mamma jokes, which to me makes it even funnier. That and the "JJJEEEYAAAAA!!!!!" afterwards.

The document Eric wrote describing music that was I guess being played in one of his classes was hilarious, despite the fact that it was full of racist and homophobic slurs. It seems the more he hated something the funnier he described it.

Ok, I'm an idiot, but what does jjjjeeeeyaaaaa mean? How do you pronounce it? I've never seen that except in Eric's writing.

I definitely laughed during the 'Eric Harris Inside Columbine' video, when he's spinning the phone round and says "Weeee!" to himself. The big kid!

Tomb wrote:

Ok, I'm an idiot, but what does jjjjeeeeyaaaaa mean? How do you pronounce it? I've never seen that except in Eric's writing.

I always thought it was supposed to be a reaction to the joke, like laughing or saying "YEAAAHHH!!!" I could be wrong though haha.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] ok lol, all these years I've saw that and thought, "Well, now how does one pronounce that and what does it mean?" I'm roughly the same age that they would be and I'd never heard or seen that.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] it's all good, I only assume this b/c based on most of what I've read about Eric, I get the feeling he had a couple weird sayings that were exclusively his haha

During Radioactive Clothing:

Quote :

Eric: Yea, yep, a few years ago when that first atomic bomb went off, near here, they uh, for some reason, some of these clothes have been just getting pretty radioactive on us, so we gotta go take em out.

Dylan: Yea, it’s a good thing we uh, we ordered those radioactive..shit.

Eric: Welp, we got this new guy on our team now, name’s uh, what the fuck was your name?

Tomb wrote:

Ok, I'm an idiot, but what does jjjjeeeeyaaaaa mean? How do you pronounce it? I've never seen that except in Eric's writing.

I like that you mention this. I've always pronounced it [jeh-ya], and am always thoroughly amused. Also, I agree with [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] , I think it is another way of expressing humor/amusement and excitement.

During Hitmen for Hire, there is a group of guys running away when E+D arrive. I wonder if it's intentional...
Super late edit: image 404'd

I was watching a clip on you tube which is just Eric and Dylan's scenes in that Rachael Scott movie (which are grossly inaccurate btw). There is this scene where they show the "hit men for hire" video to the class. Everyone looks visibly disturbed and Rachael asks the teacher "do we really have to watch this?". In the background of that clip you can see the Dylan actor making gun signals at the tv the class are watching. I found it pretty funny. I'm the same age group as Eric and Dylan and I remember being part of the goth/metal scene at high school. Heaps of boys I knew where pretty similar to them, maybe not sooo angry though.

How about Mindy Pollock's description of Dylan?

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