Seventeen years of Columbine

We are now nearer to the seventeenth anniversary of 4/20 than to the sixteenth. (April 20 is six months after October 20.)

If someone told you today that you had only six months to live, what would you do?

On this day in 1998, Eric and Dylan knew that they would be dead in about half a year ... but the folks they ended up killing had not even the slightest inkling of what was to come.

...

Every year, I do a countdown to the anniversary, where I note things that happened on this day in late 1998 or early 1999.

As of this day - October 22 - Eric, Dylan, and the 12 students and one teacher they killed had already seen their last Memorial Day, their last summer solstice, their last Fourth of July, their last Labor Day, their last fall solstice, and their last Columbus Day. They were about a week away from their last Halloween, a little more than a month away from their last Thanksgiving, and roughly two months away from their last Christmas (and Hanukkah).

...

On Friday, October 23, 1998 - seventeen years ago tomorrow - Eric wrote the following in his journal:

someones bound to say "what were they thinking?" when we go NBK or when we were planning it, so this what I am thinking. "I have a goal to destroy as much as possible so I must not be sidetracked by my feelings of sympathy, mercy, or any of that, so I will force myself to believe that everyone is just another monster from Doom like FH or FS or demons, so It's either me or them. I have to turn off my feelings." keep this is mind, I want to burn the world, I want to kill everyone except about 5 people, who I will name later, so If you are reading this you are lucky you escaped my rampage because I wanted to kill you. It will be very tricky getting all of our supplies, explosives, weaponry, ammo, and then hiding it all and then actually planting it all so we can achieve our goal. but if we get busted any time, we start killing then and there, just like Wilks from the AlIENS books, I aint going out without a fight.
Once I finally start my killing, keep this in mind, there are probably about 100 people max in the school alone who I dont want to die, the rest, MUST FUCKING DIE! If I didnt like you or if you pissed me off and lived through my attacks, consider yourself one lucky god damn NIGGER. Pity that a lot of the dead will be a waste in someways, like dead hot chicks who were still bitches, they could have been good fucks. oh well, too fucking bad. life isnt fair... not by a long fuckin shot when Im at the wheel, too. God I want to torch and level everything in this whole fucking area but Bombs of that size are hard to make, and plus I would need a fuckin fully loaded A-10 to get every store on wadsworth and all the buildings downtown. heh, Imagine THAT ya fuckers, picture half of denver on fire just from me and Vodka. napalm on sides of skyscrapers and car garages blowing up from exploded gas tanks.... oh man that would be beautiful. -- 10/23/98

Note that 1998 had the same calendar as 2015, but 1999 had a different calendar from 2016.

Unlike 1999, 2016 is a leap year. January and February 1999 had the same calendar as January and February 2016, but March through December had a different calendar.

In 1999, April 20 fell on a Tuesday; in 2016, it falls on a Wednesday.

Thanks for the post, but its in the wrong subforum I believe.

I've moved this from Sandy Hook - Thoughts on the Shooting to Columbine - Thoughts on the Shooting.

LPorter101 wrote:

If someone told you today that you had only six months to live, what would you do?

Exactly the same things I'm doing. Any other answer would mean I'm doing it wrong.

"If you re planting a plam tree and the end of the world is abotu to arrive, don't stop what you are doing" - words I've been living my life by.

The anniversary's going to be on a Tuesday.
Huh.
Edit: I'm an idiot lmao

Well, just gives me an idea how long the planning relaly was. I wonder if by oct 98 they already knew its gonna be April? Did they still had plans to buy calicos at that point?

Sabratha wrote:

Well, just gives me an idea how long the planning relaly was. I wonder if by oct 98 they already knew its gonna be April? Did they still had plans to buy calicos at that point?

Eric wrote about in on his website already in April 1998 that it was going to happen in April [1999].

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Lananas wrote:

The anniversary's going to be on a Tuesday.
Huh.

Not in 2016 ... it's going to be on a Wednesday.

January and February 2016 have the same calendar as January and February 1999. But 2016 is a leap year.

1999
Sunday, February 28
Monday, March 1
[...]
Tuesday, April 20

2016
Sunday, February 28
Monday, February 29
Tuesday, March 1
[...]
Wednesday, April 20

Jenn wrote:

I've moved this from Sandy Hook - Thoughts on the Shooting to Columbine - Thoughts on the Shooting.

Ah, I clicked the wrong link. Sorry and thanks.

Sabratha wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

If someone told you today that you had only six months to live, what would you do?

Exactly the same things I'm doing. Any other answer would mean I'm doing it wrong.

"If you re planting a plam tree and the end of the world is abotu to arrive, don't stop what you are doing" - words I've been living my life by.

So you'd get up every day and go to work? I wouldn't. I'd go on a six-month vacation.

LPorter101 wrote:

Sabratha wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

If someone told you today that you had only six months to live, what would you do?

Exactly the same things I'm doing. Any other answer would mean I'm doing it wrong.

"If you re planting a plam tree and the end of the world is abotu to arrive, don't stop what you are doing" - words I've been living my life by.

So you'd get up every day and go to work? I wouldn't. I'd go on a six-month vacation.

Who told you I get up every day to work? ;)
I may work for a corporation, but I know my ways around the system enough not to have to work 5 days a week like most bricks out there

Sunday, November 8, 1998

Eric Harris wrote:

heh heh heh. I sure had fun this weekend. lets see, what really happened. before going to the Rock n Bowl we stopped by King Soopers and one and [censored] picked up some big ass stoges. we then went to the Rock n Bowl and I had a few cigarettes and one of brand new cigars. we then went back to [censored] house where her mom had previousely bought us all a fuck load of liquor. personally I had asked for Tequilla and Irish cream, Vodka got his vodka, and there was beer, whiskey, schnopps, puckers, scotch and of course, orange juice! so we had some fun there playing cards and making drinks. we eventually made it to bed at about 5AM. got up at 10, went to safeway got some donouts and then I took Vodka home. the bottle of Tequilla is almost full and is in car, right by my spare tire and right by the bottle of irish cream. heh heh. I'll have to find a spot for those. and by the way, this nazi report is boosting my love of killing even more. like the early Nazi government, my brain is like a sponge, sucking up everything that sounds cool and leaving out all that is worthless, thats how Nazism was formed and thats how I will be too! - 11/8/98

Thursday, November 12, 1998

Fuck you Brady! all I want is a couple of guns, and thanks to your fucking bill I will probably not get any! come on, I'll have a clean record and I only want for personal protection. Its not like I'm some person who would go on a shooting spree.... fuckers. Ill probably end up nuking everything and fucking robbing some gun collectors house. Fuck, thatll be be hard. oh well, just as long as I kill a lot of fucking people. Everyone is always making fun of me because of how I look, how fucking weak I am and shit, well I will get you all back: ultimate fucking revenge here. you people could have shown more respect, treated me better, asked for my knowledge or guidence more, treated me more like senior, and maybe I wouldn't have been as ready to tear your fucking heads off. then again, I have always hated how I looked, I make fun of people who look like me, sometimes without even thinking sometimes just because I want to rip on myself. Thats where a lot of my hate grows from, the fact that I have practically no selfesteem, especially concerning girls and looks and such. therefore people make fun of me... constantly... therefore I get no respect and therefore I get fucking PISSED. as of this date I have enough explosives to kill about 100 people, and then if I get a couple bayonetts, swords, axes, whatever I'll be able to kill at least 10 more. and that just isnt enough! GUNS! I need guns! Give me some fucking firearms! - 11/12/98

" you people could have shown more respect, treated me better, asked for my knowledge or guidence more, treated me more like senior"

So he didn't want to be accepted--he wanted to be praised or held above other people. That's why he killed--because he wasn't recognized as the master.

Tuesday, November 17, 1998

Eric Harris wrote:

HATE! I'm full of hate and I Love it. I HATE PEOPLE and they better fucking fear me if they know whats good for em. yes I hate and I guess I want others to know it, yes I'm racist and I don't mind. Niggs and spics bring it on themselves, and another thing, I am very racist towards white trash p.o.s.s like [censored] and [censored] they deserve the hatred, otherwise I probly wouldnt hate them. Its a tragedy, the human nature of people will lead to their downfall. Peoples human nature will get them killed. whether by me or Vodka, Its happened before, and not just in school shootings like those pussy dumbasses over in Minnesota who squeeled. throughtout history, Its our fucking nature! I know how people are and why and I cant stand it! I love the nazis too... by the way, I fucking cant get enough of the swastika, the SS, and the iron cross. Hitler and his head boys fucked up a few times and it cost them the war, but I love their beliefs and who they were, what they did, and what they wanted. I know that form of gov couldn't have lasted long once the human equation was brought in, but damnit it sure looked good. every form of gov leads to downfalls, everything will always fuck up or yeah something. its all DOOMed god damnit. this is beginning to make me get in a corner. I'm showing too much of myself, my views and thoughts, people might start to wonder, smart ones will get nosey and something might happen to fuck me over, I might need to put on one helluva mask here to fool you all some more. fuck fuck fuck it'll be very fucking hard to hold out until April. If people would give me more compliments all of this might still be avoidable... but probably not. Whatever I do people make fun of me, and sometimes directly to my face. I'll get revenge soon enough. fuckers shouldn't have ripped on me so much huh! HA! then again its human nature to do what you did... so I guess I am also attacking the human race. I cant take it, Its not right... true... correct... perfect. I fucking hate the human equation. Nazism would be fucking great if it werent for individualism and our natural instinct to ask questions. you know what maybe I just need to get laid. maybe that'll just change some shit around. thats another thing, I am a fucking dog. I have fantasies of just taking someone and fucking them hard and strong. someone like [censored] were I just pick her up, take her to my room, tear off her shirt and pants and just eat her out and fuck her hard. I love flesh... weisses fleisch! dein weisses fleisch emegt mich soo... Ich bin dech nur ein gigilo! I want to grab a few different girls in my gym class, take them into a room, pull their pants off and fuck them hard. I love flesh... the smooth legs, the large breasts, the innocent flawless body, the eyes, the hair; jet black, blond, white, brown. ahhh I just want to fuck! call it teenage hormones or call it a crazy fuckin racist rapist... BJ ist mir egal. I just want to be surrounded by the flesh of a woman, someone like [censored] who I wanted to just fuck like hell, she made me practically drool, when she wore those shorts to work.. instant hard on. I couldnt stop staring. and others like [censored] in my gym class, [censored] or whatever in my gym class, and others who I just want to overpower and engulf myself in them. mmmm I can taste the sweet flesh now... the salty sweat, the animalistic movement... Iccchhh... lieeebe...... fleisccchhhh. who can I trick into my room first? I can sweep someone off their feet, tell them what they want to hear, be all nice and sweet, and then "fuck em like an animal, feel them from the inside" as Reznor said. oh... thats something else... that one NIN video I saw, broken or closer or something, the where the guy is kidnapped and tortured like hell... actual hell. I want to do that too. I want to tear a throat out with my own teeth like a pop can. I want to gut someone with my hand, to tear a head off and rip out the heart and lungs from the neck, to stab someone in the gut, shove it up to the heart, and yank the fucking blade out of their rib cage! I want to grab some weak little freshman and just tear them apart like a fucking wolf. show them who is god. strangle them, squish their head, bite their temples into the skull, rip off their jaw. rip off their colar bones, break their arms in half and twist them around, the lovely sounds of bones cracking and flesh ripping, ahh... so much to do and so little chances. -- 11/17/98

"weisses
fleisch"
- perfect
- song
- for
- me

Friday, November 20, 1998

They had five months to live.

Sunday, November 22, 1998

Eric Harris wrote:

Well folks, today was a very important day in the history of R. Today along with Vodka and someone else who I wont name, we went downtown and purchased the following; a double barrel 12ga. shotgun, a pump action 12ga. shotgun, a 9mm carbine, 250 9mm rounds, 15 12ga slugs, 40 shotgun shells, 2 switch blade knives, and total of 4 - 10 round clips for the carbine. we....... have.... GUNS! we fucking got em you sons of bitches! HA! HAHAHA! neener! Booga Booga. heh. its all over now. this capped it off, the point of no return. I have my carbine, shotgun, ammo and knife all in my trunk tonight and theyll there till tomorrow... after school you know its really a shame. I had a lot of fun at that gun show, I would have loved it if you were there dad. we would done some major bonding. would have been great. oh well. but, alas, I fucked up and told [censored] about my "flask". that really disappoints me. [censored] I know you thought it was good for me... in the long run and all that shit, smart of you to give me a such big raise and then rat me out, you figure it was supposed to cancel each other? god damn flask, that just fucked me over big time. now you all will be on my ass even more than before about being on track. I'll get around it though, If have to cheat and lie to everyone then thats fine. THIS is what I am motivated for, THIS is my goal. THIS is what I want to do with my life! you know whats weird, I dont feel like a punching through a door because of the flask deal, probly cause I am fucking armed now. I feel more confident, stronger, and more Godlike. I have confidence in my ability to dese(cei)ve people. hopefully Ill make it to April, but that might not happen. Ug, Its been a busy weekend, I need to sleep, I'll continue tomorrow. - 11/22/98

17 years. 17 years and it still baffles me how nobody in that family checked their son's room, read his journal, or even just poked around a little bit. I guess the old saying is true, if you give someone enough rope they'll hang themselves with it.

Like reading that hate, that anger...I was an angry teenager but I never wanted to blow up the world, I just wanted things to get better and they eventually did. Someone his age thinking things of that magnitude just screams sociopath.

Thanks for sharing the journal entries. They reminded me to be grateful for everything i hate in life today and that I am not angry!

LPorter101 wrote:

Sunday, November 22, 1998

Eric Harris wrote:

.... hopefully Ill make it to April, but that might not happen....

I’m confused here. What does Eric mean by this?
That NBK might not happen? He just wrote that the purchase of the guns was the ”point of no return”?
Does he mean that he wants to kill people NOW, and that April is too far away?

1891 wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Sunday, November 22, 1998

Eric Harris wrote:

.... hopefully Ill make it to April, but that might not happen....

I’m confused here. What does Eric mean by this?
That NBK might not happen? He just wrote that the purchase of the guns was the ”point of no return”?
Does he mean that he wants to kill people NOW, and that April is too far away?

I think he meant that he might kill himself before april, if he was having the homicidal/suicidal thoughts that he talked about. I think he meant that NBK might not happen if they couldn't get the guns, but once they got the guns they could kill people. He didn't want to be patient and wait it out, but he had no choice.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.].
If you had been a horribly bullied teenager who was abused by the majority of your classmates like I was you might be surprised by what you'd feel and think.
I know as I was once going down the same path E &D did along with a close friend of mine.
I had thoughts as bad as Eric, maybe even worse at times, and I am not a psychopath.
This is why I think so many people have trouble understanding E &D especially Eric.
I think he developed severe anger and emotional problems in the last few years of his life but most simply do not understand what it is like to be that angry and bitter.
Or they don't understand what it is like to be severely bullied.
Yes, I know that Eric did not have it as bad as some kids out there did but I firmly believe that he was routinely bullied and disrespected.
I think its hard for a lot of people to understand if you have never been there.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.],
I agree that Eric could be arrogant about some things but him saying things like "If only I got more compliments" and If only I had been treated better and with more respect." sound like fundamental human longings that were probably never fulfilled for him.

PaintItBlack wrote:

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.].
If you had been a horribly bullied teenager who was abused by the majority of your classmates like I was you might be surprised by what you'd feel and think.
I know as I was once  going down the same path E &D did along with a close friend of mine.
I had thoughts as bad as Eric, maybe even worse at times, and I  am not a psychopath.
This is why I think so many people have trouble understanding E &D especially Eric.
I think he developed severe anger and emotional problems in the last few years of his life but most simply do not understand what it is like to be that angry and bitter.
Or they don't understand what it is like to be severely bullied.
Yes, I know that Eric did not have it as bad as some kids out there did but I firmly believe that he was routinely bullied and disrespected.
I think its hard for a lot of people to understand if you have never been there.

I was bullied pretty badly, from 4th grade all the way through high school just about. But i never wanted to shoot up my school. I'm also a girl though so maybe we deal with things a little differently. I was depressed and had suicidal thoughts, and I did wish some of those kids would get the shit beat out of them but I never wanted any of them dead.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.],
I am also female.
It is good that you were able to deal with your mistreatment that way.
All I can say is that a person can have the same thoughts and feelings that E &D did without being a psychopath.
I know this firsthand since it happened in my own life.

PaintItBlack wrote:

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.],
I am also female.
It is good that you were able to deal with your mistreatment that way.
All I can say is that a person can have the same thoughts and feelings that E &D did without being a psychopath.
I know this firsthand since it happened in my own life.

Oh I believe it, my brother is one of those people. Thankfully now he is older and has a family of his own he has decided that killing people is really not a good option in life. (lol)

Thursday, November 26, 1998

Their last Thanksgiving.

Did they go shopping on Black Friday?

Less than one month to go till their last Christmas.

Less than five months to go till their last breaths.

Better late than never:

Thursday, December 3, 1998

We actually may have a chance to get some machine pistols thanks to the Brady bill. If we can save up about 200$ real quick and find someone who is 21+ we can go to the next gun show and find a private dealer and buy ourselves some bad-ass AB-10 machine pistols. Clips for those things can get really fucking big too. - 12/3/98

Was this part of the 11/22 entry?

yesterday we fired our first actual firearms ever. 3 rounds from the carbine. taught that ground a thing or 2. I even had the 2 clips in my pocket while talking to vodkas dad about senior ditch day. God it felt great firing off that bad boy, and hopefully I'll be able to get more than just 4 clips for it. I dubbed my shotgun "Arlene" after Arlene Sanders from the DOOM books. She always did love the shotgun. Vodka's DB is looking very fucking awesome, all cut down to the proper lengths. this is a bitch trying to keep up on homework while working on my guns, bombs, and lying. by the way, I bought that flask in the mall and I had a friend fill it up w/ scotch whiskey, only had about 3 swigs in the 3 weeks I had it. plus monday I gave my T and IC to Vodka, just in case. I never really did like alcohol, just wasn't my thing, but It felt good to just have around. that argument on the 22nd was a real bitch, but I think I should have won a fucking oscar. I even quoted a few movies, remember "what the hell am I gonna do now man?! what am I gonna do!?" thats good ole Hudson from aliens. Sounded good too. and hey goddamnit I would have been a fucking great marine, It would have given me a reason to do good. and I would never drink and drive, either. It will be weird when we actually go on the rampage. hopefully we will have plenty of clips and bombs. Im gonna still try and get my calico 9mm. just think, 100 rounds without reloading.... hell yeah!

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

Oh Wayne...what a difference a simple little question could have done...


According to Eric in the basement tapes, neither Wayne or the clerk at the gun shop asked any further questions.


I think that is pretty odd. But it seems like weapons and ammunition are sold like candy in America, so maybe it is not a big deal ;)

Wednesday, February 3, 1999

Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold are released from Jefferson County's Juvenile Diversion Program.

By this day (January 31) in 1999, Eric and Dylan and their thirteen victims have already seen their last:

* Memorial Day
* Summer solstice
* Fourth of July
* Labor Day
* Fall equinox
* Halloween
* Thanksgiving
* Hanukkah
* Winter solstice
* Christmas
* New Year's
* Martin Luther King Jr. Day

They've already seen their last Olympics, their last NBA and NHL championship games, their last World Series, and (on this day) their last Super Bowl.

Steven Curnow, Daniel Mauser, Kelly Fleming, John Tomlin, Kyle Velasquez, Cassie Bernall, Rachel Scott, Lauren Townsend, Isaiah Shoels, Dave Sanders, and Dylan Klebold have all celebrated their birthdays for the last time in their lives.

Daniel Rohrbough, Matt Kechter, Corey DePooter, and Eric Harris had birthdays early enough in 1999 for them to celebrate before their deaths.

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

I wonder, did he give out the house # or the computer #?

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

Dumb or on purpose? I'm not saying I believe it, I'm just entertaining the possibility that he wanted to be caught.

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

What he should've done was just give them the wrong phone number (make it look like an accident) and then just wait a day or so after they were supposed to be in and then just call them up.

Eric didn't have a cell phone but I believe he had a pager. He could've had them page him.

eli27 wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

Dumb or on purpose? I'm not saying I believe it, I'm just entertaining the possibility that he wanted to be caught.

There is like a million easier ways to get caught if he wanted to.

eli27 wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

Dumb or on purpose? I'm not saying I believe it, I'm just entertaining the possibility that he wanted to be caught.

I have often wondered this myself.

Did they look for signs? Did they feel that *almost* getting caught so many times was kind of a sign in and of itself - like, "Go ahead and do this - nobody can stop you"?

1891 wrote:

eli27 wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

Dumb or on purpose? I'm not saying I believe it, I'm just entertaining the possibility that he wanted to be caught.

There is like a million easier ways to get caught if he wanted to.

I too kinda feel like Eric wanted to get caught but he didn't want to make it obvious to Dylan that he was trying to get caught. Maybe 'caught' isn't the right word because I don't believe Eric wanted to spend eons in jail either but I do believe he was looking for something to happen that would put a stop to it.

He was leaving all kinds of stuff laying around that his Dad could've picked up on but never did. The tape recorder on the kitchen counter. The gas in the crawl space. Receipts in the trash can for propane tanks (not sure about this one because he left them there just a few hours before the massacre happened and I'm not sure if anyone was home at Eric's house that morning). At one point in time he had guns and liquor in the trunk of his car. Eric also mentioned he had his gun partially visible in his duffle bag when he and the other boys went out shooting.

Just little stuff like that.

Jenn wrote:

1891 wrote:

eli27 wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

Dumb or on purpose? I'm not saying I believe it, I'm just entertaining the possibility that he wanted to be caught.

There is like a million easier ways to get caught if he wanted to.

I too kinda feel like Eric wanted to get caught but he didn't want to make it obvious to Dylan that he was trying to get caught. Maybe 'caught' isn't the right word because I don't believe Eric wanted to spend eons in jail either but I do believe he was looking for something to happen that would put a stop to it.

He was leaving all kinds of stuff laying around that his Dad could've picked up on but never did. The tape recorder on the kitchen counter. The gas in the crawl space. Receipts in the trash can for propane tanks (not sure about this one because he left them there just a few hours before the massacre happened and I'm not sure if anyone was home at Eric's house that morning). At one point in time he had guns and liquor in the trunk of his car. Eric also mentioned he had his gun partially visible in his duffle bag when he and the other boys went out shooting.

Just little stuff like that.

For me, it is pretty obvious that neither of Eric’s parents were home at that time. They did very much that last morning and the painter/carpenter who was working at the neighbor house said he heard glass breaking in the Harris garage that morning and the morning before. Would they break glass in the garage if Wayne or Kathy were home? And record their goodbye video while they were home? Also, Wayne says in his 911 call that he hadn’t talked to Eric that day.

I’m sure the tape recorder was placed there just before they went to Columbine. It wasn’t just laying around the house and if they did, why would they be interested in that? The gas in the crawl space was a smell that Wayne said to the Police wasn’t normal. The receipts were just thrown in the trash can. Didn’t mean anything.

About the guns and liquor, he had to hide it somewhere and there is no reason why Wayne would go thru Eric’s trunk and suspect anything. They didn’t even go down to his room, which Kathy says in the 11k.

I just don’t see it anywhere that he wanted to get caught. All he talks about in his journal is how much he’s looking forward to killing people and how he hates everyone.

All the stuff Eric left around the house the day of the shooting, I just interpreted that as him not giving a shit any more because he was going to die afterward anyway.

There's not a chance Harris wanted to get caught. The signs he left behind were mostly down to him being a clumsy teenager. Everything he did and said pointed to him living for that day.

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

1891 wrote:

eli27 wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

1891 wrote:

Jenn wrote:

LPorter101 wrote:

Tuesday, December 29, 1998

jesus christ that was fucking close. fucking shitheads at the gun shop almost dropped the whole project. oh well, thank god I can BS so fucking well. I went and picked up those babies today, so now I got 13 of those niggers. WOOHAH. the stereo is very nice, but having no insurance payments to worry about so I could concentrate of BOMBS would have been better. oh well, I think I'll have enough. now I just need to get Vodka another gun. - 12/29/98

It wasn't the guy at the gun shop's fault. Why the hell did Eric give them his home phone number?

Incredibly stupid. If he had a cellphone (which he hadn’t) that would be a totally different thing but to leave out the home number to a gun shop when you are underage and buying clips for automatic weapons…

Yeah, that was dumb.

Eric and Dylan got lucky ... way lucky.

Dumb or on purpose? I'm not saying I believe it, I'm just entertaining the possibility that he wanted to be caught.

There is like a million easier ways to get caught if he wanted to.

I too kinda feel like Eric wanted to get caught but he didn't want to make it obvious to Dylan that he was trying to get caught. Maybe 'caught' isn't the right word because I don't believe Eric wanted to spend eons in jail either but I do believe he was looking for something to happen that would put a stop to it.

He was leaving all kinds of stuff laying around that his Dad could've picked up on but never did. The tape recorder on the kitchen counter. The gas in the crawl space. Receipts in the trash can for propane tanks (not sure about this one because he left them there just a few hours before the massacre happened and I'm not sure if anyone was home at Eric's house that morning). At one point in time he had guns and liquor in the trunk of his car. Eric also mentioned he had his gun partially visible in his duffle bag when he and the other boys went out shooting.

Just little stuff like that.

For me, it is pretty obvious that neither of Eric’s parents were home at that time. They did very much that last morning and the painter/carpenter who was working at the neighbor house said he heard glass breaking in the Harris garage that morning and the morning before. Would they break glass in the garage if Wayne or Kathy were home? And record their goodbye video while they were home? Also, Wayne says in his 911 call that he hadn’t talked to Eric that day.

I’m sure the tape recorder was placed there just before they went to Columbine. It wasn’t just laying around the house and if they did, why would they be interested in that? The gas in the crawl space was a smell that Wayne said to the Police wasn’t normal. The receipts were just thrown in the trash can. Didn’t mean anything.

About the guns and liquor, he had to hide it somewhere and there is no reason why Wayne would go thru Eric’s trunk and suspect anything. They didn’t even go down to his room, which Kathy says in the 11k.

I just don’t see it anywhere that he wanted to get caught. All he talks about in his journal is how much he’s looking forward to killing people and how he hates everyone.

Actually, it was mentioned that after Eric got caught with a pipe bomb, that his Father did surprise inspections on Eric's bedroom and his car. To me it just doesn't seem like a great idea to leave things like that in a place you know your Dad can search at anytime without any warning.

And not just little things Eric left laying around. He was also crying on video and upset when he talked about his family, he said a few different times how things could have been 'different'. He talked about happier times when he lived in New York and his friends there. To me, this does not sound like someone who wanted to die. I believe that he had a bit of hope that something would change and they wouldn't go through with it.

Dylan on the other hand, I believe he was a lost cause. He wanted to die and couldn't die fast enough. I see no signs whatsoever that he wanted anything other than to kill himself. I just believe he was too much of a coward to do it by himself and used the massacre to finally go through with it. I also think Dylan may have waited a split second to see if Eric would kill himself before actually doing it himself.

I think people like Cullen have it backwards. I think Dylan was the one who thought of the idea and I believe Eric followed. Just like Eric followed a bunch of other things that Dylan liked. I also believe that Eric was the one having second thoughts about it, not Dylan. A lot of people base their opinion on Eric by reading his journal, where he acted all big, bad and tough for an audience. Where he ranted about hating the world and wanting to kill everyone and this and that. But aside from his journal (where a lot of it was him acting tough) I believe a part of Eric didn't want to go through with it.

Keep in mind, people, that Eric wrote his journal the way he did because he knew people would be reading it.

However, even if they didn't go through with it, I have no idea if it would have even been possible for Eric to go on and live a normal life. Would he always be homicidal and suicidal? Would his outlook on the world change once he got out of high school? Was he too mentally damaged to ever be fixed? I have no idea. I just feel like, after everything I've read and gone over the past 4 years, that part of Eric wanted something to happen so they wouldn't go through with it. With Dylan, I feel like he was too far gone and if he didn't go through with Columbine, he would have eventually killed himself sometime later. Eric though, I'm not sure.

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1. I don’t agree with that. I think it just shows how bad his life turned out from what was pretty okay before he moved to Littleton. It’s a very common thing to reflect on your life when you know that you are going to commit suicide. I mean, you are going to end your own life by choice. And Eric admits that things have been hard and shows sign of guilt towards his parents, he knows that this will destroy their lives. Eric (and Dylan too) of course wanted life to be better, but they didn’t see it coming and hated the world for what it did to them. And if Eric wanted to get caught or not go through with NBK, he would’ve get caught. They were lucky, because they did some silly mistakes.

2. I do agree with the other part. I think Cullen has got it completely wrong. Or mostly wrong. Although Dylan kept a journal long before Eric did, but people tend to forget that Eric wrote on his website. The “Rebel missions” was all the way back in 1997. We don’t know how the conversations went when they talked in IRL and not in journals or on the web. But I do think Dylan suggested it too, and Eric thought it sounded like a great idea as they build up to the fact that they were actually going to do it. I think Dylan needed Eric’s “creativity”, if we can call it that. I get the feeling that Dylan was a little bit lazy.

3. Yes, Eric wrote in his journal because he knew people would read it, but it is the same angry language he is using on his old website. Sure, some of it is acting but it gives a picture of how angry he is.  

4. If they didn’t go through with it, I think Dylan at some point would commit suicide too. Maybe college could have been a new start for him – or it could push him even further, depending on how good he would fit in. But it could have done it good. Going to class with people who have the same interests as him and not having to deal with the type of people he hate. But who knows. I don’t think he ever had a serious plan about college anyway. The application was just a cover.
Eric is more difficult to analyze here. But I think they both were too damaged and to self-destructive to turn it around. But who knows?

I think he left the stuff around to make it impossible to come home again. So he would have to do it. He was painting himself into a corner.

Remember he also wrote "CHS" on his wall alongside a bomb and a fuse with the word "clue" under it. That along with the ammo, gas, tape, receipts, etc. is not possible to explain to your parents, who by the time he'd arrived home would surely have seen it.

There is a large pattern of school shooters doing something they can't take back right before the shooting in order to compel themselves to go through with it. It could be shooting a family member or love interest, rigging a house with bombs or explosives, or simply leaving behind indisputable evidence of your plans. Eric seemed to require many such forms of motivation, from the wall drawing to the diversionary bomb to even carrying the bomb into the cafeteria--by all outward appearances an innocuous act that once performed nevertheless could not be taken back.

Mid-February 1999

Mid-February, Dylan came downstairs dressed to go to work, though he wasn’t scheduled. Eric’s dog Sparky was seriously ill, so Dylan had picked up Eric’s shift at Blackjack. I was fond of the little dog and felt sad for Eric; it’s hard to lose a pet, especially an animal you’ve grown up with. As he left the house, I gave Dylan a hug and told him how proud I was that he was such a responsible employee and a good and loyal friend.

As of this date in 1999, 15 people had less than two months to live.

Saturday, March 6, 1999

Eric and Dylan, along with Mark Manes and his friend Jessica Miklich, go out to Rampart Range to shoot their guns.

LPorter101 wrote:

Saturday, March 6, 1999

Eric and Dylan, along with Mark Manes and his friend Jessica Miklich, go out to Rampart Range to shoot their guns.

Phil Duran also went there with them.