"I'm Not Ashamed" movie hits theaters on Friday, October 21

I informed him when I first heard this movie was in the making that they will be using that fake statement and he corrected me and told me "But it did happen, I remember it happening 100%".
He didn't go into detail but he refereed to the reports about Eric's short conversation to Rachel.

I don't know, I never believed it but if it did happen then my opinion was Eric may have just made a comment about God towards Rachel's corpse as he walked by, no interaction and no dramatic Hollywood hair tuggin'. Richard insist that the report is true though. I would ask him to tell me in his words the whole story but it is not a nice subject to bring up to him, but he is very reachable he recently did an interview on YouTube about marijuana.

Are you talking about the last version of events he has claimed happened where he said that after he was shot that Eric asked him if he believed in God and Richard said no, thereby causing Eric to leave him alone and move on to Rachel?

PaintItBlack wrote:

Are you talking about the last version of events he has claimed happened where he said that after he was shot that Eric asked him if he believed in God and Richard said no, thereby causing Eric to leave him alone and move on to Rachel?

Yeah, there are so many variations on this that unless someone was standing there, minding their own business and heard any of the numerous variations of these alleged exchanges, AND managed to get away with their life, I think we would have heard by now.

To be honest, this is a ploy to martyrdom Rachel and for SOMEONE to TRY to make a quick buck.

This "incident" is one of biggest pet peeves and ranks very low on what I actually care about.

The reason I am doubtful about that version is that Richard has told 3 versions of what happened and I know he was greatly traumatized and could have become confused over the years, especially since people have asked him to tell the story of Rachel's martyrdom over and over.

Tomb wrote:

PaintItBlack wrote:

Are you talking about the last version of events he has claimed happened where he said that after he was shot that Eric asked him if he believed in God and Richard said no, thereby causing Eric to leave him alone and move on to Rachel?

Yeah, there are so many variations on this that unless someone was standing there, minding their own business and heard any of the numerous variations of these alleged exchanges, AND managed to get away with their life, I think we would have heard by now.

To be honest, this is a ploy to martyrdom Rachel and for SOMEONE to TRY to make a quick buck.

This "incident" is one of biggest pet peeves and ranks very low on what I actually care about.

Richard Castaldo Challenges the Official Columbine Narrative:

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It is discussed here:

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I don't believe it too. I think she had perished instantly. But he said that it did happen. I don't know if they are paying him to say it or confusion from being shot.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] I'm not sure if he was referring to the statement of both of them being questioned or just her. All I told him is they are going to add the conversation between Harris and Scott in the movie, to see if he was angry about it.

spidEr wrote:

I don't believe it too. I think she had perished instantly. But he said that it did happen. I don't know if they are paying him to say it or confusion from being shot.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] I'm not sure if he was referring to the statement of both of them being questioned or just her. All I told him is they are going to add the conversation between Harris and Scott in the movie, to see if he was angry about it.

My two cents is that he may well believe it did happen. After 17 years and so much shock, confusion, and of course being shot himself on top of everyone asking him questions over and over and hearing so much speculation he may think that is what actually happened.

Evidence points to the fact that Rachel died right after being shot. She may have cried or whimpered briefly but I do not believe any exchange happened

Isn't it too much of a coincidence though for the same question to be asked in the library too WHERE it ACTUALLY happened to a survivor, Valeen, who was asked if she believed in God? Also don't forget Cassie got the same myth for awhile.

Rachel SCOTT Autopsy Diagram:

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Yes, I've seen those. The key to the whole saga would be the findings, which, like Eric, Dylan and Isaiah are numerous pages long.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] You are a treasure trove of information and I love it! I'm curious how you have accumulated so many rare stories and photos and even more curious (and jealous) of your organizational skills. You're awesome!

I thought those diagrams were lost forever, thanks!

sororityalpha wrote:

Rachel SCOTT Autopsy Diagram:

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Rachel still had her backpack on when she was shot and later when she was moved. We know from the above diagrams the entrance & exit pathways of the gunshots. My question to you is this:

CBI 1048/JCSO 10283 - Copper Jacketed Bullet from Rachel's Backpack.

This bullet/fragment matches to Eric's Hi-Point Carbine.

Which gunshot do you think went into the backpack? Does this further show what position Rachel may have been in when she was shot?

My opinion would be 2. Perforating gunshot wound to the trunk, based on entrance and exit locations. I can only base that on the very limited information available in addition to the descriptions of the other gunshot wounds. Locations of the wounds, and the fact of exit wounds also further narrow down where the bullet in the backpack could have originated from.

It does not reveal at all what position she was in when she was shot, although I seem to remember that she was in a sitting position when she was shot.

Great. So obviously the whole fabricated hair-pulling conversation on the ground shit in the movie is fairytale.

Eric & Dylan scenes:
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] - Eric bulled by jocks.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] - Eric & Dylan observe bullying in the commons.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] - Last basement tape recording.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] - Eric & Dylan in class listening to Rachel's speech.
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] - Slaying of Rachel.

^bleh. Why do they have the e&d characters wearing their nbk shirts outside of the massacre? Were they scared the audience would forget who they were supposed to be or did they just have a limited wardrobe for them...

*edited to say the only time the "Eric" actor actually looks like him is towards the end of the basement tapes clip as he walks up to the camera and he's kinda blurry. Then once he's close up it doesn't look like him anymore haha

I refuse to watch this movie or even the clips associated with it. I choose to be blessedly ignorant of the whole thing.

I think that African American jock kid is suppose to represent Isiah since he was one of the very few black people at the school, but they've just presented him as a bully.

Tomb wrote:

I refuse to watch this movie or even the clips associated with it. I choose to be blessedly ignorant of the whole thing.

I wish it didn't exist too, I just had to see if they portrayed Eric and Dylan accurately even though I wish I could close my eyes and this film would go away.

Kiwik wrote:

^bleh. Why do they have the e&d characters wearing their nbk shirts outside of the massacre? Were they scared the audience would forget who they were supposed to be or did they just have a limited wardrobe for them...

*edited to say the only time the "Eric" actor actually looks like him is towards the end of the basement tapes clip as he walks up to the camera and he's kinda blurry. Then once he's close up it doesn't look like him anymore haha

Everything you said I agree with, when I too thought it was strange seeing them in those shirts in class, I also thought the part before Eric says "too late" captured Eric's face/head shape since the video was not in HD.

So people have watched this movie? It didn't play anywhere close to where I am and I literally had even forgotten about it until I came back to the board. Where did you see it, in a theater or was it a straight to DVD type thing? I saw months back one or two of those Robertson people of Duck Dynasty fame was in it and that immediately clued me in as to what type of movie it would be. What roles do they even play in the film?

ETA So what's the general consensus? Seems no one likes it from what I've read.

Lizpuff wrote:

spidEr wrote:

I don't believe it too. I think she had perished instantly. But he said that it did happen. I don't know if they are paying him to say it or confusion from being shot.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.] I'm not sure if he was referring to the statement of both of them being questioned or just her. All I told him is they are going to add the conversation between Harris and Scott in the movie, to see if he was angry about it.

My two cents is that he may well believe it did happen.  After 17 years and so much shock, confusion, and of course being shot himself on top of everyone asking him questions over and over and hearing so much speculation he may think that is what actually happened.

Evidence points to the fact that Rachel died right after being shot.  She may have cried or whimpered briefly but I do not believe any exchange happened

THIS. It describes how I feel about the situation and I don't think I could put it any better .

If there is any evidence that ever comes out that proves Rachel died a martyr,I would look at it with an open mind.

Rachel broke up with her boyfriend? Why she went to prom with Nick? Why that day, she had lunch with Richard? All these boys were just her friends?
In my opinion many of the problems Eric was related to the fact that he was not physically able to repel pitching. But in the film he plays a grown muscular man. If Eric was such a physique, he most likely would find a way to his anger in fights.

I also think Richard believes it happened.
But, we know that trauma, specifically with adolescents, can create fake memories. It is not at all uncommon for a victim of a violent crime to "make up" a story to aid in their healing.
Nothing at all personal against Richard, but from the evidence, it's unlikely that Rachel spoke to Eric.

I'm wondering if Richard gave his first story of this happening before or after learning about Eric's conversations in the library. Perhaps if he knew of Eric's "do you believe in God" question being asked, he integrated that into his own experience.

For anyone wanting to watch the movie, for the time being, it's on YouTube.

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Thank you Jenn

I enjoyed the movie. I accept that some events were fabricated but I think they were true to Rachel and her struggle. And that's what matters most to me.

Cinema Snob made a review about the film:



Had to click it immediately. I enjoyed it. This way I don't need to watch the whole thing.

I can tell just by the channel name that they're going to eviscerate it.

The movie is coming out on DVD on the 24th Jan, hopefully within a week we'll get a torrent or a stream.

Seen it in it's entirety. I liked it, a very well made movie. They didn't even need to lie about her death. If she was just shot then and there like she was in real life, it wouldn't take anything away imo. May you rest in peace Rachel Joy.

I don't think I'll ever be able to bring myself to actually watch this movie despite my curiosity over it, but I did watch the Cinema Snob review and that showed enough for me.

Based on the clips I've seen it probably would've just been better to leave the shooters out of the movie and only include them during the actual shooting scene itself. They should've done it the way the Dawn Anna movie did and make the shooting happen out of nowhere with no one prepared for it, like how it was in real life. I get that the movie's main focus was to make Rachel out to be a martyr who was targeted for her faith (which I still have a problem with). But a side story of e&d planning for nbk kinda takes away from it being a story about *Rachel* and Her life.

It looks like the e&d characters get a lot more screen time than I expected, but their scenes are kinda embarrassingly done and exaggerated. Its weird to me with as sensitive as everyone is about not giving e&d the attention they wanted, that a movie that gives them multiple scenes with speaking parts was backed by the family of one of the (more famous) victim's of the shooting...

I also think that no one would show Eric and Dylan in the movie, if it's really a film about Rachel.

I thought the film was good. Mind you, my expectations were low. I liked the juxtaposition between scenes, between Rachel and Eric/Dylan.

Watch the film but treat it as a movie and not a documentary.

I see it has been posted here but  while I was working late at night 2 weeks ago I saw an ad for the film on pay per view. Not allowed to order pay per view there so I have not seen it yet.
It is out on dvd as Juicy Jazzy said.I'm going to buy the movie but I'm not expecting much from what people have said. I will buy it for my Columbine collection if nothing else.I hope the soundtrack will not be digital only someday, I'd like to have a hard copy.


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There is also a soundtrack for the film


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And a sort of a companion book

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